Fiona's Finesse

Should we stand strong and oppose the enemy?

Do we have to bare our souls to the devil?

Name the price for peace, I’ll pay it

I’ll offer my soul, anything

Give me just one thing in return

Serenity

Let my blanket of security hide me

Seek your pleasure somewhere else

For now, leave me

Leave me alone and shrouded

Straight from the heart
The arrow sliced
Through blood, muscle and skin
It reached its goal
Piercing, bursting
Bringing pain and torment
Twisting and digging
Tearing and pulling
Then it was over
The pain and torment no more
The twisting and digging
The dragging and pulling
It came out the other side
Skin resealing itself
No mark left, no scar to show
Taking with it all the pain and torment
What was a storm is now a calm clear sea
Peace and tranquillity in abundance
The wet waves washing away the worry
The sun dominant in its shine
Warm light and comfort providing
Where life resumes as normal

You saw the whole of the moon
I only saw the eclipse
You saw the brilliant brightness
Whilst I was covered in darkness
You saw the chance of a lifetime
When I only wanted to hide
Shrouded in black
I never saw what you did
I lived in the blackness
Exposed and frightened by the light
You held the brightness control button
A twist to the left
A tadge to the right
Always adjusting it to your needs
Simply something to play with
Whilst I was left dreaming, hoping, longing
To escape to the whole of the moon

She was a funky and fun five door fiesta
On the clear open road you really could test her
She cruised along, her control so smooth
The radio playing, we played some grooves
At five weeks old she was shiny and new
But was she purple or dark navy blue?
It happened so fast, so clear in my mind
Overtaking the lorry we were travelling behind
We saw the police car, we thought it was moving
Sh***, the brakes full on, the idea deluding BANG
There was nothing we could do, we crashed into its back
Thank heaven for seat belts and that is a fact
Wandering about it seemed completely insane
That a police car was parked on the outside lane
There was no lights, no cones nor warning to say
There had been an accident which they’d just cleared away
They reassured us that we weren’t to blame
Should there not be a chicken somewhere in this game?
To the local police station we were all driven
No tea or coffee nor phone call given
Still in shock they showed us the door
Did you not know that they closed down at four?
I wont rabble on, it only gets worse
Now it’s a question of a fiesta, an escort or a 2nd hand hearse

^On wounded wings I want to fly^

^On wounded wings there’s no pie in the sky^

^On wounded wings I want cry^

^On wounded wings no time to buy^

^On wounded wings I’m left to cry^

^On wounded wings I heave a sigh^

^On wounded wings I’ve had to try^

^On wounded wings my soul to fry^

^On wounded wings I want to die^

^On wounded wings my flight goodbye^

Wind with gentle intentions
Flow through me tonight
Blow away the cobwebs
That are entangled in my soul
Spring clean me with your spirit
Eradicate the dirt embedded
Sweep and dust away the dark
Cleanse me
Free me
Make me feel alive again
Take apart the webs that have been weaved
Brush away the gathered debris
For another season

Taking flight
Leaving the safe secure nest
That has provided for me
All these years alone
In hiding
Now I spread my wings
I fly
To fly amongst the others
Develop and grow
To soar even higher
Showing myself for who I am
Not how people think
The butterfly which once was a bug
No one shall capture me
Nor my beauty within
See past my torn and jagged edges
And seek my real identity
Fly with me
Let me be your guide
Along this road not travelled
Be not alone in overcoming new hurdles
Or be afraid of things unfamiliar
Accept the person you might become
Embrace and welcome them
Love them
Share your knowledge freely
And the knowledge will free yourself

Then I started to die
My petals fell to the ground
Unable to be replaced
Not even with care
My roots became frail and brittle
I grew weaker day by day
Until all that was left was a stump
Where life no longer existed

They wept as I died
Watching me grew weaker
Knowing there was nothing they could do
I was no longer something to be proud of
Just a stump
Which they left
Hoping that I would grow again, regain life
Hoping that they hadn’t lost me forever
So that once more, they could call me blossom
Just like they always did

But these doors holding nothing now
Left bare, dark and frightening
What do I do with them?
I wish they had never been opened
For I have to live with the knowledge these doors kept hidden
They have been opened and explored
Sometimes I wish they had been closed as soon as they had been opened

What about the doors that have been opened just ajar?
Which have only been peeped into
What happens to them?
They either need to be opened fully
Or closed and locked
Forever

They can’t stay as they are
Because they scare me
I don’t know what to do with them
I need to find the key

Shining diamond in the sky
Do you hear my plea, do you see me cry?
Give me hope, show me heaven
For too long now I’ve had to brave them
Show me your face, show me your eyes
Offer me hope, no more lies
I’ve been patient, I’ve been good
I’ve served my time, release my mood

Shining diamond in the sky
Help me live or let me die
Send me to heaven, send me to hell
Whichever one I’ll ring the bell
End it here, end it now
To your decision I will bow
Shining diamond in the sky
Whatever happens, please don’t cry

You fly and flutter in the air
Are you concerned, do you care?
Your life is easy; your life is simple
Do you worry about a pimple?

I wish I was, I wish I was a fairy
Escape from life, anything scare
Your cute, clean image, your pretty dresses
You hold the secret to what life possesses

You dance and prance in the sky
But can you see the tears in my eye?
Prove to me there’s magic in your wand
Because throughout my life I’ve been conned

I wish I was a wee fat fairy
My life would be peaceful and not so scary
And if I saw a tear in your eye
I would give you a squidge to stop you cry

You don’t know love, you don’t know pain
What’s in life is there for me to gain?
I take some comfort that you’re up above
But please release me like a dove

Did I really dance upon the table?
After what I drank, I’m not sure I was able
Singing "I will Survive" rings a bell
I’m covered in bruises, I must have fell
And who’s this number on my hand
Was it the barman or someone from the band?

My purse is empty, what have I done?
Apart from the hangover, it really was fun
I let down my hair which nearly got burned
Oh God, now my stomach is starting to churn
My mascara has run, oh what a mess
I’m going to be sick, I have to confess

There it goes, of what a waste
Why did I drink those cocktails in such haste?
I’m feeling crap, never again
What’s this name on my purse, it looks like Ben!
Who is, I struggle to remember
Why did I wear a boob tube, it’s bloody December

Safe and secure we rest easy
Snuggling into it’s softness
Nuzzling it’s sweetness
And all over warmth

For some the darkness is strangling
It’s grip vice-like
It’s security too strong
And it’s warmth overpowering

They fight it’s enticement
Break free from it’s hold
And are left with nothing
But the ticking of the clock
And the cold aftermath

You can describe them to others
But then again you can’t
Because it happened to you
No one person has the same ones
You can see them clearly
But disappear when you talk about them

Like an Album
They exist
A permanent reminder of the past
Even if you don’t want them

It is there, and it opens when it likes
To spook you and bring you pain
It is evil, like it’s creator
And it must be dealt with
Before the Album can be closed
Permanently

My skin is on fire
Peeling piece by piece
Falling, left to rot
Flesh burned and pulled
Twisting and distorted
The face without a face
A soul without a soul
A life without meaning
A life not worth living

I’ve grown tired of fighting
I am weak with pain
I don’t want to go on living
I want to finish this crazy game

I can’t see my future
I can’t see the light
I can’t stand the daytime
I can’t stand the night